No, I'm not talking about baseball. This past week has made me think a lot. Watching my sister get ready for college also makes me envy her. She's actually getting out of the house. She's taking the step out into the world and on her own. She'll get a great career and where am I?
Working at a job I despise, unsure of what kind of future I want for myself, and living in my parents' basement. Not gonna lie. I love my family. They've done everything and more for me and sacrificed so much. I'm forever grateful. But, I just get sad thinking about where I could be if I tried harder. Sure, things have worked out. If I hadn't gone to Tri-C I would have never met Katie who introduced me to the love of my life. And, I have an awesome group of friends. But, I want more.
I want a car. I want to have an actual career. I want to write. I want to see the world. I want a life of my own! I make all these plans for myself and never follow through. I don't know how to motivate myself! When I talk about my dreams and goals, some people put me down and tell me I'm all talk. I've been trying to write a novel since before high school. I never get more than a few pages written. I say I'm going back to school over and over and once I get there I don't apply myself. I just don't see a point sometimes. And then I end up kicking myself when I put on my work uniform and head off for another 8 hours in hell.
SOMEONE HELP!!